


In the absence of light, darkness prevails

by crownedregality



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Dark Swan, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-11
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-07-03 12:07:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15818571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crownedregality/pseuds/crownedregality
Summary: "In absentia luci, tenebrae vincunt..." the shadows whispered, their chilled, seductive tendrils wrapping around Regina's throat in a silky caress. She could feel the pull of it, feel the call to darkness, how the terrible curse sought to plague her body like it had Emma's. It was hard to resist, hard to fight against when it whispered sweet nothings into her ear, when it promised her the safety of her son and the company of one who loved her fiercely and loyally. But as the light in her eyes started to fade when the darkness started to seep into her soul, the translation of those words began to become clear, and she suddenly understood why the Saviour had become the Dark Swan so quickly: "...in the absence of light, darkness prevails."Emma had lost her light when she had sacrificed herself to the curse of the Dark One, and now… it was Regina’s job to bring it back.Even if it killed her.





	In the absence of light, darkness prevails

**Author's Note:**

  * For [yuuhiuchiha23](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yuuhiuchiha23/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Evil Emma [Art]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15810594) by [yuuhiuchiha23](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yuuhiuchiha23/pseuds/yuuhiuchiha23). 



“Miss Swan.”

 

Perhaps she should have expected the Saviour-turned-Dark-One to appear at her door without so much as a warning in advance. She hadn’t anticipated that the woman who had once been the epitome of _superhero princess_ , but was now more of a _stereotypical villain_ , would come knocking on the former Evil Queen’s door when she had a hapless Pirate and adoring parents to run to and torment instead.

 

“Don’t call me that, Regina; we’ve been through too much.”

 

The woman standing before her wasn’t _Emma_ , not really. If the snow-white hair, porcelain skin and ruby red lips weren’t a dead giveaway that this was some phantom form of the radiant woman she had once known, then the beady, cold eyes that stared at her (eyes that had once glowed with an overwhelming warmth that was directed at a woman who was honestly undeserving of such patient, attentive kindness) sealed the deal. This version of Emma Swan was haunting in ways that sent a chill straight down the Evil Queen’s spine, and that was coming from a woman who had dealt with more than her fair share of darkness in her lifetime.

 

There was just... Something about the Dark Swan that didn’t sit well in Regina’s gut.

 

Swallowing down her discomfort, because Emma’s very presence was unnerving when she stared with those cold, calculating, unblinking eyes, Regina tipped her head in an understanding and apology that she owed to the woman who had sacrificed herself just to save Regina from the darkness. Acting so cold and so unwelcoming, acting like this version of the woman was something _entirely separate_ from the Emma she knew was hypocritical of her considering she had been forced to own and live with the repercussions of her past for the last few years now.

 

Out of everybody in town, Regina Mills was the one person who could understand this version of Emma the most.

 

“Emma.” She corrected, critical eyes taking in the blonde from head-to-toe, observing her black crocodile skin clothes and morbid expression. Even calling her by her _name_ felt wrong but she forced herself to straighten and be the bigger woman. “What are you doing here?”

 

“Aren’t you going to welcome me inside?” Emma asked back, completely ignoring and disregarding Regina’s question. Her gaze was level, judging, and Regina floundered for a moment at being called out on her bad hosting manners. It was late, almost midnight, and the glow of the moon only added to the haunting image of the Dark One waiting impatiently for an invitation inside. Weren’t all Dark Ones blessed with the gift of incredible patience? But the shifting of her feet and bounding of her toes was something so typically _Emma_ that it curled Regina’s gut for more than a few moments.

 

“That depends on your intentions, _Em-ma_.” Regina accentuated the name with a sharp click of her tongue, understandably distrustful of the woman standing in front of her. This wasn’t the Emma she knew, and with Regina’s long history of dealing with the Dark One, she knew that the powerful entity couldn’t be trusted as far as it could be thrown, no matter which body it occupied.

 

Even if it currently occupied the body of one of the people Regina trusted the most.

 

It was hard to get a reading on this new Dark One. After Emma Swan had consumed the black vortex for Regina, when she had _sacrificed herself_ for the Mayor who had almost been drained alive by the overwhelming darkness that choked her from the inside, she had disappeared in a puff of smoke alongside the dagger designed to control her. There had been immediate panic as soon as the infuriating blonde had disappeared: Snow and Charming immediately called for a witch hunt to locate their perfect daughter, the hapless Pirate had demanded for his girlfriend to reappear as though he had any power over her, and Regina had gone— _numb_.

 

The shock had taken a long time to wear off. It was only when Henry embraced her, murmuring an “are you okay, mum?” into her ear, that she seemed to snap back into the present to notice the chaos around her. There was panic, overwhelming and uncontainable panic, enough that Snow and Charming had rallied half the town to _find Emma_ before Regina had even been able to form a coherent counter-argument or reason as to why poking the hornet’s nest of an evolving Dark One was a bad idea.

 

So they had hunted for Emma. For days and days and days, they had searched for her. Regina had hardly slept, hardly _ate_ , and it was difficult when it was her own child prompting her to join him for dinner rather than the other way around. How distraught must he be? To lose one of his _mothers_? And yet there he was, her patient little Henry, her _angel_ of a boy who merely offered her small smiles and squeezed her hand, spreading hope and love and _life_ in a way that was so _Emma_ that Regina wanted to vomit up the minimal morsels of food she had been encouraged to consume.

 

She should call Snow now, now that Emma had turned up of her own accord, now that she was clearly _alive_ but… but she knew that precious Snow White wouldn’t react well to seeing her daughter like this. Even Regina, who was used to seeing people at their darkest selves, was taken aback by the difference in the Saviour. Poor Snow White would pop a vein from her screeching if she ever saw her precious little princess like this.

 

“If I wanted to _hurt_ you, Your Majesty, I wouldn’t have knocked first.”

 

Emma’s dry sense of humour was given with a chillingly emotionless expression. Although her words rung true (after all, why would she announce her presence first if she truly wished Regina harm?), Regina was still hesitant enough with this foreign body standing right before her not to let her in. If she hadn’t insisted on sending Henry to stay with Snow and Charming that night, desperate for the boy to have a break from worrying about every crease she might not have stepped aside and let the Dark One so willingly into her house.

 

Emma waltzed in with less confidence than Regina expected. When the door was shut and she had caught herself staring at the strange woman who had once been her best friend for a few moments too long, she briskly stepped towards the kitchen, the Dark One obediently following her like some long lost little puppy. Although Emma had seemed confident and sassy at the doorstep, dressed to the neck in black with sinfully red lips, she seemed nothing more than a downtrodden little abused animal once inside the house and (supposedly) away from any prying eyes.

 

“Have you spoken to your parents?” Regina moved on auto-pilot as she pulled out a mug and prepared Emma a hot chocolate, one topped with whipped cream and the special cinnamon she had purchased for Henry. _Well_ , she used to buy the smaller bottle for her son, but since Emma had become more of a frequent presence in her house over the last few years, that bottle of cinnamon had become _jumbo family pack_ size. It was incredible how fast the two of them could get through it.

 

She turned in time to see the sullen shake of her head as Emma sunk herself down onto the of the barstools, lips pursed and eyes downcast as she traced absent patterns on the surface of the counter. It was something so typically _Emma_ that Regina’s heart clenched and pulled with a strange longing, something that reminded her of just how much she missed her best friend.

 

“Emma.” She reasoned as she placed the mug in front of the white-haired woman, who didn’t even react at the sudden presence of her favourite treat right before her. With a tired, irritated sigh (because Emma was a _giant child_ anyway, but she could quickly turn into a _giant sulky child_ during a strop, apparently even as the infamous and terrible Dark One), she crossed her arms over her chest and eyed the woman strictly. Why did Regina always have to be the mature adult knocking everybody else into shape?

 

“You need to see them. They’re worried _sick_ about you.”

 

“I know.” The response was monotone, Emma’s voice even and unfeeling as she lifted her cold eyes to look at Regina. The way she looked at the former Queen was unnerving enough that Regina turned away to busy herself with her own coffee: black, no sugar.

 

“If you know, then why haven’t you gone to see them to put their mind to rest? You could have at least sent them a _message_ reassuring them that you hadn’t exploded into a vortex of black dust! Do you know how _worried_ we were?! How were we even supposed to know that you were **ALIVE?!** ”

 

Regina’s words had raised in volume and intensity the more she spoke, and by the end of her furious questioning, she had turned on her heel to threaten Emma with the teaspoon clasped in her shaking hand. How _dare_ she? How _dare_ this **thing** —this _woman_ —how dare she not even leave a note?! How dare she hide away for days on end?! How dare she let her family and friends believe that she was _dead_?! How dare she sit idly by when those who loved her could barely stomach food or sleep at night not knowing what had happened to her?! The _selfish little_ —

 

Regina took a heaving, even breath, attempting to calm down the racing of her heart and slow down the harsh breaths she had been taking. She was furious, furious enough that her teeth hurt from how hard she was clenching them and she was sure that the Dark One would currently be in flames if the intensity of her glare could actually translate into real heat, but she couldn’t get too worked up. This was still the **Dark One** even if it currently occupied Emma Swan’s body. After all, Emma would _never_ have let her family suffer in her absence.

 

“I’m alive.”

 

Regina slammed her mug of coffee down so hard on the counter that the porcelain cracked, but Emma didn’t even flinch. She didn’t seem overly affected at all which only added fire to Regina’s rage, enough for her to curl her fingers into her palm to leave little crescent indents from where her nails were digging so fiercely into her skin.

 

“Get out.”

 

Emma was looking at her oddly with an expression that Regina couldn’t quite read, but it quickly became obvious that the former Queen had been reading the Dark One wrong the entire night. Where she had seen an impassive, expressionless face before, she was now realising that the emotional stunting she had assumed was going on was merely masking a deeper hurt that seemed to radiate in the blonde’s eyes. But by the time she had seen it, by the time she even _realised_ what it was, there was nothing she could do.

 

“Emma, _wait_ —” But it was too late. She was gone.

 

With a dejected sigh, Regina poured the untouched hot chocolate down the drain and cursed herself for her short sightedness and temper. There had to be a reason that Emma had come to her and instead of finding that reason out and _helping_ her, helping her out of this darkness and back to herself, all Regina had done was shout and scream and push her away.

 

What an _idiot_.

 

* * *

 

 

It had been over a week since Emma’s visit and Regina’s exhaustion had long since passed the point of collapse. Luckily for her, her old archnemisis and her insufferable husband were faring worse than even she, so very few people noticed the darkening circles under her eyes, nor did they question her constant snappish mood or sudden reclusiveness that harkened back to the days before the town had fully trusted her again.

 

Regina wasn’t the only one who seemed to avoid the townspeople since Emma had become the Dark One. The infamous Pirate who was best known for sourcing his rum through shady Storybrooke back-alleys now seemed to spent the majority of his time aboard his ship, drunk as a skunk, and Regina hadn’t allowed herself to dwell on why he didn’t seem to be helping to locate the blonde with her overwhelming gratitude that she wasn’t forced to endure his company whilst formulating a way to find Emma and free her from the curse of the Dark One.

 

Cradling a steaming mug of coffee between her hands, Regina offered a weary smile to Snow, who lowered herself down on the bench opposite the woman who had irrepairably destroyed large parts of her life, but one of which she now called _family_. There was so much bad blood between them and yet they were two of the closest people in the town now. It was _funny_ how much of an impact one singular person could make on all of their lives: _Emma Swan_.

 

“She came to see me last night.”

 

Regina looked up then, surprise lifting her brows at Snow’s confession. After seeing Emma in her own home over a week ago, there had been no sighting of her since. She had told Snow and Charming, of course, mostly to pre-warn them about their daughter’s current… _state_. She had debated not mentioning it for a while but had finally concluded that, if it were Henry, _she_ would want to know that he was still alive even if he had become the literal personification of darkness.

 

Because mothers loved their children endlessly and that was a lesson Regina had only learnt when she had first held Henry in her arms when he was barely more than a few days old.

 

“Oh?” She asked, eyes taking in the woman opposite her properly for the first time that day. Snow looked… more bedraggled than normal, more _exhausted_ , and Regina immediately picked up that it was a sign that her ‘meeting’ with Emma hadn’t exactly been a cause for celebration.

 

“She’s so—oh, _Regina_ , what do we do?”

 

The wetness in Snow’s eyes was enough for Regina to pull back a little with slight disgust, because now wasn’t the time for tears, not when the Dark One probably had eyes everywhere if the titbits of information they had gathered over the last week was anything to go by. It was probably some magical trick to watch them, but Regina had been unable to locate any magical source that could imply that Emma was, indeed, spying on them through some sort of device, a bit like Regina used to as the Queen with her mirrors.

 

“What happened?” She tried to keep the impatience from her tone but it was hard when she could almost feel Snow’s rapid ascent to becoming a blubbering mess, and _that_ wasn’t something Regina could deal with right now.

 

“She—she’s a completely different person! Her skin, her hair, she’s--- _oh_ , Regina, she’s ice cold to the touch! And she doesn’t _care_! She told me that she broke up with Hook and that she had been enjoying not being around us and that she wanted to stay as the Dark One and—” She sniffed pathetically, and Regina winced, praying to all the Gods that might exist in this realm that Snow didn’t burst into tears. She really, really didn’t have the patience of emotional capacity to console a sobbing mother mourning for her child that had been possessed by something borderline demonic.

 

“She doesn’t know what she’s saying.” Regina interrupted, her best attempt at consoling Snow being to try to convince her that Emma was really clueless about what was going on with her. “She’s the Saviour, remember? She’ll be fighting that darkness with every fibre of her being. You don’t need to worry; we _will_ get her back.”

 

It was sickening to say, sickening to assume that Emma was currently lost to them because she _wasn’t_ , not in Regina’s eyes at least. There was no such thing as a black and white “good” and “evil” scale; instead, there were tones of grey, some darker than others but not altogether different. The ideology that Snow White lived by, one in which she romanticised the “pure” and the “good” and shunned the “darkness” and the “evil” people was something that irritated Regina to no end. But Snow White had always been a naïve little princess; how could Regina expect her to be any different now that she was slightly older?

 

The information that Snow had provided her certainly was interesting though. As Snow blabbered on about other small little details, like how Emma avoided physical contact and seemed to not want to be in her mother’s orbit for too long (something Regina could fully understand and relate to), the Queen built a mental map in her head in order to hopefully better navigate the complicated woman next time she came across her.

 

After leaving Snow once she had gathered all of the information she needed, she pulled out her phone to send a rather important text.

 

 **[TEXT: EMMA SWAN]:** Come to mine for dinner at 6 o’clock sharp. Don’t be late.

 

She received no reply, but she didn’t expect to.

 

* * *

 

 

The fastest way to getting through to Emma had always been through food. It was something Regina had learned early on in their complicated relationship, back when she had wanted nothing more than to drive Emma out of town. She had turned up at Granny’s with a basket full of apples and had been met with the sight of the new pain in her ass dressed in nothing but her underwear and a tank top, and it had taken almost all of her free will to keep her eyes on the blonde’s face, but nothing had been able to stop her predatory expression.

 

She had then used food to her advantage to try to poison the woman (quite literally) and get Henry back completely for herself. The apple turnover had been a perfect way to solve her Emma Swan problem and, given the blonde’s apparent insatiable appetite for all food, she knew it was going to work. And it _would_ have if her son hadn’t eaten it instead.

 

Later in their relationship, when they had become more tentative friends, they had shared breakfast, lunch, and occasionally dinner at Granny’s (even though Regina loathed the food there and Emma made a point to tease her about it every time, but the brunette endured it simply to enjoy the time with the three of them as a small family group). After that, when the food there had really started to get to the impeccable Queen and when both Henry and Emma had succumbed to Regina’s relentless lecturing at their poor eating habits, their weekly dinners had moved to Regina’s house, where she cooked them a healthy meal that both biological mother and son usually devoured with ease.

 

Once that schedule had been established, it wasn’t uncommon for Emma to join them for dinners on other days of the week, and when she was usually invited over, Regina made her enough food to take some home as leftovers and re-heat to eat as another meal (because she was _sure_ that Emma couldn’t even cook toast without burning it, so how she had functioned as an adult was beyond her). Those dinners had dwindled down sometime when Hook became more clingy and demanding of Emma’s time, and Regina loathed the pirate for it.

 

She glanced at the clock when the doorbell went off. 6:07pm. Of course, it was typical of Emma Swan to be late. Even as the Dark One – supposedly the most powerful and influential being in all the realms – she couldn’t even turn up on time. She probably didn’t even walk or drive to the house, which gave her no excuse as to why she could possibly be late when all she’d have to do was wave her hand and ‘poof’, as Emma used to so elegantly put it when Regina had tirelessly tried to teach her the spell of transportation.

 

She only stopped for a brief second to check her flawless appearance in the mirror – perfect hair, painted lips, dark eyes – before sliding to the door to open it. Her heels click-clacked on the hardwood floor, announcing her presence to the woman waiting outside long before she actually opened the wood. And there she was, the personified Dark One, dressed in her black leather with her ruby lips and icy skin. This time, Regina wasn’t too distracted by the shock of Emma’s new appearance to miss how the other woman’s eyes seemed to leisurely track down her body, quite obviously checking her out.

 

Was that the darkness or Emma herself? Regina wasn’t sure whether she was more unnerved by the sheer evil force lusting after her or the woman trapped within the web of crushing darkness wanting her.

 

“You’re late.” She turned on her heel and marched to the dining room, her disapproval obvious with her straight posture, and she caught Emma’s shrug in the mirror as the Dark One diligently closed the door behind her. They followed an eerily familiar routine of settling themselves at the table as though there was absolutely nothing amiss with either of them and this was a normal Friday night for them, save for the absence of Henry, which had become more of a common occurrence these last few months with his increased interest in socialising with his friends at school.

 

The silence was overwhelming as Regina dished them both out portions of the lasagne she had made. She was accustomed to Emma constantly nattering and filling in the brief pauses of silence in the conversation. She was used to hearing _everything_ about the blonde’s day, even if that included details that really were incredibly dull, or did not interest Regina in the slightest. Now… now, however, all she was met with was silence, and it made her feel more than a little bit uneasy.

 

But the silence wasn’t the only thing that disturbed the little façade that they were trying to create. Regina had taken several bites of lasagne, but Emma hadn’t even touched hers, and instead seemed intent to just stare at the former Queen with an uncomfortably intense gaze.

 

“ _Eat_.” Regina snapped unhappily, disturbed by how the woman who used to shovel her cooking into her mouth now didn’t even seem bothered by it. It was a… startling change to the woman who she had grown to know so well over the last several years.

 

“I don’t need food to sustain myself.” Emma responded simply, voice dulled at the edges like a training sword, cold and lifeless, but her eyes were expressive as they focused on Regina. The Queen tensed her jaw in irritation and cut a little too hard at her lasagne, the screeching of her knife against the plate showing her frustration more than her facial expression.

 

“That has never stopped you before.” She cut out dryly, and was momentarily startled by the chuckle that came from the woman across her. She looked up in time to catch the amused flash of a smile that had twisted the Dark One’s lips and she felt a hot flash of _something_ course through her body that tasted surprisingly like victory. _So there is somebody behind that mask you put up, Emma_.

 

It seemed as though her words had done the trick because the dark one proceeded to eat. It was disappointing how she didn’t make those silly little noises she usually made whilst eating (moans of which Regina was certain probably belonged in the bedroom rather than directed towards food), and how she wasn’t throwing enough compliments to drown Regina in about the quality of the food. Emma’s continuous stoking of her ego over her cooking abilities was something that the (slightly) vain Mayor enjoyed experiencing on their family dinner nights, and the absence of those compliments were yet another thing to add to the mounting list of things that _weren’t quite right_.

 

“Snow told me that you went to visit her.” Regina wasn’t going to tread on eggshells around Emma: despite what Snow believed, despite how the town feared that Emma was going to be some ravenous Dark One with an insatiable blood lust, the blonde hadn’t actually done anything to harm anybody yet. She had mainly hidden away… _somewhere_ … although Regina had the sneaking suspicion that she had been meeting up with their son because Henry had been oddly quiet about the subject of seeing his biological mother, as though he was already in contact with her somehow.

 

She wouldn’t be surprised if he was. The two had always had a habit of going behind her back and forming secret _operations_ without her, even long before she was fully aware of them.

 

“Snow can’t keep her mouth shut about anything.” Emma responded with a cruel smile, and Regina scowled, reminded abruptly of the truth of that sentence. _No_. She wouldn’t let the Dark One mildly manipulate her and, by the sparkling cold eyes, that was exactly what the other woman was trying to do.

 

“She’s just worried about you.” Regina reasoned, refusing to rise to the bait.

 

“Well I don’t care for her worrying, I’m perfectly fine. What did she tell you? Did she say how _evil_ I am? How I am not her _daughter_ when I am like this? How nothing but the pure Saviour Emma will ever be good enough for her?” She laughed hollowly, darkly, and Regina felt a chill run down her spine. Perhaps she had miscalculated this situation. Emma… was a lot further into the darkness than she anticipated, perhaps drowning further and further with each passing day. Didn’t it usually take a while for the darkness to consume a person? Emma--- Emma was falling at an accelerated rate, and Regina felt helpless to stop it, flopping helplessly like a fish out of water whilst Emma drowned in the darkness she couldn’t be saved from.

 

“No, Emma, she—“

 

“Did she tell you I broke up with Hook?” Emma rudely cut in, tracing her fingers along the wood of the table again, drawing some pattern that Regina didn’t recognise. She was sure that the temperature of the room had dropped a few degrees but she forced her body not to visibly react, even though goose-bumps had started to prickle across her skin.

 

“She did.”

 

“ _Of course_ she did.” Emma responded with a victorious smile, and before Regina could even blink, the Dark One was beside her, the clawing scent of strong perfume so unlike Emma that she could barely suppress a wince. This woman was a different entity from the bumbling blonde and Regina’s heart ached for the friend she had lost.

 

“Do you remember the most important lesson the Dark One taught you all those years ago, Regina? Because _I_ do. They whisper it to me, tell me in my dreams, haunt my days by providing me the same tutorage they gave you. What’s the lesson, Your Majesty?”

 

She was close, close enough for Regina’s gaze to harden threateningly, the former Queen not silly enough to fully let her guard down with the woman even though Emma was once her best friend. She just couldn’t risk it. Not when the blonde had the ability to end her with nothing more than a simple thought and a swipe of her fingers.

 

With no answer received, Emma scowled and placed a finger under Regina’s chin, the sharp nail cutting into her dark flesh enough to be felt but not to break the skin.

 

“Know what you want and go after it… with _everything_ you have.”

 

Liquid heat spread through her body when the Dark One’s gaze lowered to her lips purposefully before Emma disappeared in a puff of smoke, and Regina was left only with her pounding heart and uneven breaths.

 

 _Know what you want and go after it… with everything you have_.

 

And what was it that the Dark One wanted?

 

* * *

 

 

Emma was getting worse. Regina hadn’t seen her through the remainder of the week but she had been busy cleaning up after the destructive blonde. Where the former Saviour had been quiet and reclusive to start with, presumably scheming or moping or both, she was now making up for her silence by tormenting the town. It was only little things, little _irritations_ that she seemed to solve with a click of her magical fingers. A dwarf was turned to stone, some townsfolk had been located chained up in the Sheriff’s station without any due reason, and the Dark One had been dishing out enough barbary words to reduce several of the inhabitants of Storybrooke to tears.

 

And yet Regina had hardly seen her.

 

It was only when word got to the Mayor about how Emma had stolen a heart that the former Queen actually hunted the Dark One down herself.

 

“Miss Swan!” She hollered angrily, breaking into the Dark Swan’s newly built house without any care in the world, the door behind her rattling with the force of which she slammed it. She startled when Emma appeared on the sofa, lounging back casually and sipping on a wine she never would have touched before becoming… _this person_.

 

“Why, _Regina_! What a pleasant surprise!” She cooed mockingly, but made no move to get up. “Let yourself in as you always do. You know you’re more than welcome in my house.”

 

“ _What_ have you done?!” Regina snapped, her fury only mounting as she crossed over to the Dark One with short, sharp steps that clicked menacingly on the hardwood floor. Emma, to her credit, didn’t seem remotely phased by the sharp advancement of the furious former Queen.

 

“What are you referring to? If it’s the _décor_ of my new house then I can walk you through how I sourced the material for the rugs and decided on the colour scheme for the drapes—”

 

“You **know** what I’m referring to!” Regina roared, patience thin on the best of days, but she had been worn down to the bone with this whole situation with Emma. It seemed as though no matter how hard they all tried, they were hitting dead end after dead end with trying to bring Emma back from the grasp of the darkness, and now… she was falling further and further into the pit of darkness and the former Queen worried they wouldn’t be able to pull her out.

 

With the woman’s silence, Regina’s jaw clenched as her fury mounted.

 

“You took someone’s _heart_!”

 

“So?” Emma questioned with an unbothered shrug and purse of her lips as though they were discussing confectionaries rather than life or death.

 

“What do you mean, _so_?!” Regina snapped, disbelief dripping from her tone as she shook her head harshly. She couldn’t _believe_ Emma! The blonde never would have done this! She never would have been so _terrible_ \---

 

“You’ve done it a hundred times over. You can’t lecture me.” Emma responded simply, and Regina… oh, by all the Gods, she wanted to slap the darkness straight out of Emma. Preferably repeatedly, and straight in the face. The reminder of Regina’s old deeds only added more fuel to her rage even though Emma’s words were nothing but true.

 

“You’re a better person than this, Emma. I was _weak_ and I let hatred rule my life and turn me into that person. Don’t let the darkness consume you.” Her words or expression must have been truly pathetic from the way that the Dark One barked out a mocking laugh.

 

“Oh, Regina.” Emma cooed, and within a flash, she was right in front of the Mayor. It took everything in the brunette not to flinch away as cold fingers came up to stroke along her cheek with a possessiveness that curled her stomach. “I’m still _me_ , I am just… **better** now. More _powerful_ , less _pathetic_. I know what’s good for me and what isn’t, and I know what I want.”

 

Emma leaned in, her breath tickling Regina’s lips and the brunette’s traitorous heart thundered in her chest at their proximity. What was this? What was the darkness doing to the Saviour? Regina knew the pull herself, the seductive whispers and promises that the abyss of evil tempted a person with, but this— _this_ was turning Emma into something else entirely, something that dumped her boyfriend and chased Regina instead.

 

“ _Emma_ , this isn’t you. It isn’t _like_ you. Please… there must be a part of you still in there, a part that can hear me?” Regina tried, despite her breathlessness, despite the thundering of her heart as the Dark Swan all but invaded her personal little bubble.

 

“I’m still _me_ , Regina.” Emma promised with a curl of her lips, inching all the closer. It was hard for Regina to hold her ground but she was a Queen and refused to back down or bend to any person, even a Dark One. “I’m just more… _confident_ , shall we say. I am tired of my _weaker parts_ preventing me from getting what I want, and I want **you**. Why would I settle for a hideous, drunk pirate when I can have a ferocious Evil Queen?”

 

Regina spluttered then and finally took a step back, her shock at Emma’s confession forcing her to put some distance between them. This was _ludicrous_. Yes, there had always been _something_ between them, something there, lingering under the surface, and maybe… maybe Regina _had_ fantasised about the possibility of tasting Emma Swan, but… that was just a **fantasy**. Emma Swan was more interested in a one-handed boatman who wore more eyeliner than even her than an ex Evil Queen. Despite all the chemistry between them, despite the heated glances and telling interactions, Regina wasn’t even sure that Emma herself had openly accepted that she was _into women_.

 

What was happening now was the darkness coming for Regina and exploiting a weakness that it recognised in her: her weakness _for_ Emma.

 

“Don’t be _ridiculous_ , Emma.” Regina insisted, raising a hand when the Dark One advanced, but that didn’t seem to stop the rude woman. Nothing was stopping the predatory look the Dark Swan gave her, nor the way that had body was reacting to it, as though being tempted by the lure of darkness without her mind explicitly giving it permission.

 

“You can’t lie to me Regina, remember? I _always_ know when you’re lying, and I know you want me. I’ve known for some time. You’re not a discreet as you like to think you are.” Emma looked far too smug for her own good and Regina gulped, feeling exposed and torn open no matter how hard she fought to keep her defences up, to keep her walls up to stop anybody getting in and hurting her.

 

When she received no response, the Dark One advanced again, closing the gap between them with ease.

 

“I was too cowardly to act on what we both wanted, too worried about upsetting my parents and hurting Henry, too concerned about putting my guard down and _enabling_ you to be **bad**. I’m not worried any more, Regina, and it’s _glorious_. Now why don’t we make up for lost time? I know you want me just as much as I want you, I can see it in your eyes, even now.”

 

And what could Regina say to that? She recognised this, recognised the darkness trying to tempt her, to trap her and hold her captive. But when she looked ahead, looked into cold eyes, she could still see _Emma_ and it was enough to pull painfully at her heart. Because her _friend_ was still in there and she needed help.

 

Then cold lips met hers and the world faded away for a few seconds. It was as though something clicked into place, something righted itself after a world of wrongs and hurts, and… it was wonderful. So wonderful that her heart skipped briefly in her chest and she found that she couldn’t pull away, not even when Emma smiled victoriously into the kiss and pushed in further.

 

It was only when her back hit the wall that Regina came to her senses and roughly pushed the other woman away. The smug look on the Dark One’s face ignited Regina’s anger like she had been jabbed with a red-hot poker and, without thought, she slapped the blonde hard, and then reeled at the shock of her own aggression. She wasn’t _that person_ anymore, wasn’t somebody who used physical or magical violence on someone, but it was _so hard_ not to.

 

The violence didn’t seem to deter Emma, who briefly lifted her fingers to tentatively touch her split lip. Instead, it only seemed to encourage the Dark One further, who’s eyes twinkled and her lips curled up in appreciation as her tongue briefly swiped across her own lips.

 

“Oh, I like it when you’re _feisty_ …” She purred, leaning in again, but Regina pushed her with enough magical force for the wind to be knocked from her lungs as Emma was thrown back against the wall. The Queen was _tired_ of playing these games with the trickster.

 

“You will return that heart to where it belongs or I will make sure that you _never_ see our son again.”

 

Perhaps it was low, perhaps it was something shameful to use Henry as a weapon against his biological mother, but how else was she supposed to get through to the blonde? Nothing else was working. When around Regina, all Emma did was flirt and seduce, and when around her parents or anybody else… she only ignored them.

 

Regina disappeared into a puff of smoke without another word.

 

Three hours later, the heart was returned to the place it belonged.

 

* * *

 

 

“The darkness is going after you.”

 

Snow’s unhelpful comment was met with gritted teeth. It seemed as though Regina’s frustration with the world in general was only mounting day after day whilst Emma remained the Dark One. It was hard to tolerate Snow and Charming’s presence when they constantly spewed hope and light and then questioned why their daughter was busy chasing Regina like a horny dog.

 

They had seen Emma multiple times since the curse had grasped her and mainly for supervised visits with Henry. Since the heart incident, Regina had cracked down on her son for his own safety, and that had meant that the crafty boy hadn’t been able to sneak out and meet up with his biological mother without anyone knowing. Because of that, Emma had become insistent on meeting up with him and Regina hadn’t trusted this dark version of her enough to see Henry without somebody there for supervision.

 

That meant that on the odd occasion that both Regina and Snow were the ones supervising the visit, the annoying Snow White hadn’t missed how Emma had all but leered at Regina, and made enough innuendos for the pixie-haired woman to go off her food and give it to Henry instead. The former Queen hadn’t even found it in herself to feel embarrassed or ashamed at being so openly hit on.

 

In private, Emma had continued to pursue her, had told her how they were _good together_ and how much they _wanted each other_. Regina had rebuked her every single time because… it was true. Why would she want this Dark Swan who used everybody around her in some giant game of manipulation? _No_ , this wasn’t the Saviour Regina had grown to know.

 

And with Emma’s absence… Regina found how much she missed her. How much the sight of her red leather jacket pulled at her heart strings, how a glimpse of her photo pulled at her heart, how the reminder of their _family nights_ with Henry were enough to leave her eyes stinging and fingers trembling with a want she wasn’t used to feeling.

 

How had she underappreciated Emma this whole time? Now that she was gone… now she wasn’t there anymore… Regina _longed_ for her like she had never longed for a person in her entire life.

 

It was a horrible feeling.

 

With her silence, Snow reached out to gently touch her hand, squeezing it in reassurance. Regina’s gaze remained on the table beneath her. She knew that the darkness in Emma was only trying to feed hers, she knew that the other woman was just trying to lure the Evil Queen out from where she was lurking at the back of her mind, and yet... some part of her, a part she would never openly admit to, liked to believe that it was Emma who was really there pursuing her and kissing her. But it wasn’t. She knew that, but she didn’t want to believe it.

 

“Be careful.” Snow advised wisely, her words more telling of her understanding of the Queen’s feelings than the brunette wanted to think about, and she squeezed Regina’s hand and kissed her cheek before leaving the Mayor to her thoughts.

 

* * *

 

 

Nothing was working. No spells, potions or scenarios seemed to be pulling Emma from the darkness.

 

They had tried everything. They had summoned demons, spoken to ancient creatures, performed rituals, combined magical strengths, contemplated crossing realms and—

 

Nothing. Their efforts were coming up blank.

 

“She doesn’t want to let go of the darkness.” It was the first input Henry had properly given since Emma had been subjected to the Dark Curse. He had remained optimistic for weeks now, had happily met up with his mother, had snuck of to see her and spend time with her. He had been _the believer_ , had assured all of them that Emma could get through this, that she wasn’t _gone_ forever, that she was **strong** and she would beat this curse like Rumplestiltskin hadn’t.

 

But now, he looked dejected, looked upset and heartbroken and Regina’s heart ached for the pain that she couldn’t fix. All she wanted was to put plasters over his wounds and kiss them better, to soothe his hair and hold him close until his pain went away, but now… now, in this situation, there was nothing she could do. Because she didn’t know how to save Emma and she didn’t know how any of this, how the prospect of forever losing his mother, would ever be okay with Henry.

 

She didn’t know how to soothe her son’s pain and it was killing her.

 

“Henry, you can’t believe that…” She murmured, embracing him before she could complain, her heart cracking in her chest as he burrowed into her, seeking comfort in a way that he hadn’t since he was very young.

 

“It’s true.” He murmured in response, morose in his judgement, and she squeezed her eyes shut. If that was true, then they would never save Emma Swan.

 

Because the Dark One had to be willing to give up their darkness to be saved from it.

 

* * *

 

 

Poking the hornet’s nest only ensured that you got a sting, and that was what happened when they finally were able to get ahold of the dagger and release its dark power. Dark Ones streamed out of it, or perhaps it was the same darkness, personified into various shadowy, faceless figures that loomed around them like the plague.

 

Light magic wasn’t something Regina was overly strong at but she mustered up the strength to protect her friends and family with a short, sharp beam which encased them in a protective bubble. The darkness spread like thick smoke, flowing around her, cold to the touch and smoky, tasting like tar and hate and death.

 

"In absentia luci, tenebrae vincunt..." the shadows whispered, their chilled, seductive tendrils wrapping around Regina's throat in a silky caress. She could feel the pull of it, feel the call to darkness, how the terrible curse sought to plague her body like it had Emma's. It was hard to resist, hard to fight against when it whispered sweet nothings into her ear, when it promised her the safety of her son and the company of one who loved her fiercely and loyally. But as the light in her eyes started to fade when the darkness started to seep into her soul, the translation of those words began to become clear, and she suddenly understood why the Saviour had become the Dark Swan so quickly: "...in the absence of light, darkness prevails."

 

Emma had lost her light when she had sacrificed herself to the curse of the Dark One, and now… it was Regina’s job to bring it back.

 

Even if it killed her.

 

The world started to go numb and she could hear the muted screams of her son, who was begging, _pleading_ for the darkness to let her go, to _spare_ her so he wasn’t subjected to losing his other mother too. But the sounds were faraway, drowned out by the seductive whispering of the darkness, the low hiss and screech of it as it invaded her body and drowned her in a thick smoke that clogged her lungs and prevented her from being able to breathe.

 

Perhaps she would die after all. And what had she achieved? _Nothing_.

 

Her vision was starting to blur, obscured by the plague that was currently crippling her from the inside, rotting her and killing her without any effort at all. The edges of her vision blackened but there was no missing the shining light of her White Knight rushing in to rescue her.

 

“She is _mine_!” The Dark Swan snatched a fading Regina from one of the figures, her fingers wrapped possessively around the Mayor as she growled ferally at the darkness. It hissed at her, screeched and slashed, but she pushed out at it with a blast that obliterated it to dust. The violence of the action only spurred the other dark figures to rally and gang up on Emma, threatening her with their tall, overwhelming presences.

 

“Regina is _always_ mine.” She hissed, and Regina felt her legs give out, her body crumpling as she fell into the Dark Swan’s steady grip. Emma caught her with a flash of concern and held her close. What was going on? She was fading, and fast, and the white-hot fury flared through her as she glared up at what had hurt Regina.

 

“She is _mine_!” She roared again as one tried to take Regina from her, tried to possess her and keep her, and Emma unleased a wave of dark magic that destroyed all of the shadowy figures looming around them like vultures at a carcass.

 

As consciousness slipped from Regina, the barrier went down, and Henry rushed to her side.

 

“Mum! Mum!” He cried, touching Regina’s face, her cheeks, her pulse. Black smoke drained from her nose and her ears and her body was completely unresponsive to his touch.

 

Everything else was a blur. Snow rushed in, Charming called for help, and Henry cried as he gripped onto his adoptive mother. Emma remained stock still, shocked at what had happened, even though she refused to release the woman from her grasp. Her magic could feel how Regina’s life force was fading away, how she was slipping, and no matter how hard Emma gripped her… she wasn’t hanging on.

 

“You _have_ to save her!” Henry choked out, cheeks stained with tears and nose runny as he looked up beeseachingly at Emma. The Dark One looked helpless and out of her depth at his request, but he shook his head firmly, taking her hand and squeezing it. “We _talked_ about this mum, remember? You **love** her. You _told_ me you love her and—and she loves you _too_. All she has done is try to **help** you and she _misses_ you. You need to save her! You need to--- you _need_ to bring her back! Please!”

 

“Henry, I can’t—”

 

“ _Yes_ , you can.” The boy responded fiercely, nodding his head as he wiped at the tears streaking down his face. “You don’t _need_ the darkness to make you strong, to make you confident, to make you _happy_. You don’t **need** it! I know you think it makes you stronger and more powerful, and gets you what you want, but—but it _doesn’t_. We need you back, mum! You need to save her!” Henry’s sobs shook the Dark One’s heart and she looked down in agony, staring at the face of a woman who had relentlessly sacrificed everything for everybody else’s happiness but still hadn’t found her own.

 

“You _are_ her happiness.” Henry tried again, willing to make his mother _see_ , to open their eyes to what was right in front of them. It was a can of worms that the Dark One had opened, yes, but it was something that neither woman had truly accepted or seen because of the curse that stood between them. “ _Please save my mum_.”

 

It was hard, hard to suppress the darkness when it had given her a _freedom_ that she had never been brave enough to take herself, but… but it wasn’t _everything_ she wanted. She realised, in her heart, despite the curse that plagued her and distorted her view on the world… what she _really_ wanted was her **family** , and that included Regina.

 

A single tear trailed down her cheek as she squeezed her eyes shut and allowed the pleasant memories to flood her mind. Of family dinners at Granny’s, her parent’s embrace, Henry’s laugh, Regina’s private smile. Of dinner nights at the mansion and impromptu movie marathons, of Regina’s feet on her lap, of the peaceful look on her face when she inevitably succumbed to sleep and curled her body around Emma’s like a koala bear.

 

Emma Swan _needed_ her family more than she needed the darkness, and that family included Regina, because—

 

“ _I love you_.”

 

And then she kissed her.

 

* * *

 

 

6:07pm.

 

“You’re late.”

 

Emma’s ridiculous, shit-eating grin was met with an unamused lift of a regal brow. This purposeful tardiness was something irritating to the Queen even though she hid how it was secretly rather endearing (and how Emma Swan, in all her clumsy lateness, was at least _on time_ with how late she was).

 

“I’m sorry.” Emma apologised, but she didn’t look sorry at all as her gaze briefly raked down Regina’s body to take in the flattering dress she was wearing. “I’ll make it up to you.”

 

“I’m sure you will, my dear.” Regina’s tone had turned predatory, _suggestive_ , and her lips curled into a smirk when the blonde looked up with a deer-in-the-headlights expression on her face. Emma Swan was so much _prettier_ when she wasn’t weighed down by that curse that had been like a chain around her neck.

 

Not to mention that her kisses were far better too.

 

“Oh I will.” Emma reassured her dumbly, gaze distracted by her middrift before lifting to her eyes once more as she was beckoned inside with a crook of her finger. It was a good job that Henry was at Snow and Charming’s, because they certainly wouldn’t make it through dinner.

 

“Then come and _show me_ how you will make it up to me, **Miss Swan**.”

 

In the absence of light, darkness prevails; but the difference between light and darkness is **choice**. It is a choice between the good deeds and the bad, between giving and taking, between love and hate. But there is no such things as _darkness and light_ , no such thing as a true _good or evil_ ; instead, there is a middle, a greyscale of a perfect balance of the two, enough to make a person who they are, with personality and flaws but a good heart to match.

 

And the first step to making that balance is by accepting and loving every part of yourself.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to yuuhiuchiha23 for creating the wonderful art which inspired this fic!


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